Self-Care, Perception, and Living in the Present

Sometimes it’s more important to put self-care first no matter what is due or behind. Sanity is the utmost importance to me currently in my life. Sometimes, I like to ensure that I appreciate the life given to me, the blessings all around me, and the lessons in every failure or mistake. They are all important in this life. They can either crush you or launch you forward. I don’t plan on ever giving up, so I choose to appreciate the times I’m an arrow, pulled back and launched forward. I’m never sure of what is in store for me, and every time I think I may have things just how I want them, they don’t work out that way. Other times, I feel I’m on the right track, but something throws me a curve ball. All you can do is go with it…Why fight and complain about things not working out how they were”supposed to” when you can live for today, know you are right where you need to be, and accept that life isn’t easy, but it’s not as hard as WE can make it.

See, perception is a hell of a thing that most people don’t get. It’s hard to see an alternative to pain when you are deep in it emotionally, but it doesn’t mean that you can’t learn how to work on changing the initial perception, seeing the bigger picture, the positive instead of the negative. I’d love to say that I truly pride myself on this because I worked hard for it but I too fall victim to the negative smoke screen of life when everything you try to remain positive hasn’t worked. It’s hard to stay that way when others cannot begin to see it that way. It’s even harder when you can’t or don’t or won’t just walk away, you’re understanding, caring, and maybe people are just too attached. Sometimes we succumb to that negative perception and expectation that everything is horrible and nothing goes right for us in the world. One thing I know for certain is that when I have fell victim to the negative, I work my damndest to pull out of it even as hard as it is. Sometimes it’s more difficult than the last. Sometimes others make it nearly impossible to keep any positive moment you have made forward. Sometimes you just have to know when to say when. I don’t believe that negative just happens to me nor do I think that negative just happens to others. I do believe in karma, but I ultimately do not think that some people have a life so much harder than others on a daily basis when it comes to something always happening. That’s not saying people don’t struggle more due to finances or so many other factors. I’m talking about people with normal lives who always have something that happens to them that ruins their day every day. The thing is, that…. that used to be me. The world would end, and I would over exaggerate the feelings and experience. I kept thinking that God must have hated me. What did I do to deserve such a horrible life and shit always hitting the fan? I was stuck in my misery, my sorrow, and allowed myself to plant roots there for some time. It wasn’t the best years of my life but I’d like to think they were pretty educational. Looking back now, I was ridiculous but who isn’t when they are trying to figure out who they are and what their purpose is?

Somewhere in my self-discovery when I got sober on my own, no easy task… I figured out the key to true happiness. At least, for me on the daily…no matter where I was. It was all in how I perceived the world. It is much like having a paper cut and being over dramatic about it or just dealing with it. Life happens, things happen to people every day. The thing is, it is those who don’t perceive a problem as if its the end of the world, they may freak out for a minute or may be irritated, those are normal reactions, but ultimately they roll with it because what are you gonna do? If it was out of your control, then there was nothing you could have done to prevent it, and if you could have it, then you now know for the future. In the meantime, you figure out how to overcome or fix the situation in the best way possible and move on. There really is no reason to be so upset about it when it isn’t going to do you any good. It really just wastes more time. These people who can embrace this build their resiliency. Perception is valid. If you see the worst, the worst is there. If you look at the possibilities, then that’s what you live. I mean, it’s quite simple. I remember being so pissed at credit card companies when I first had them, and I was struggling to make ends meet. I’d be mad at the people who worked there. I mean, how is that going to help me? It’s not the person on the phone who missed a payment or made a mistake on my account. They can’t read my mind when I tell them the problem and they don’t quite understand because they’ve talked to so many people with a multitude of issues and just want specifics.

Patience people, patience. Sometimes we all get irritated at that process. Sometimes they are true morons but getting upset about it isn’t going to help. We need to treat people how we want to be treated. Think outside the subjective box and open our eyes to a world that doesn’t revolve around just us. Ever think that maybe the person the line is depressed and can’t remember what you said or isn’t thinking clearly. No, not the best scenario but I bet you go to work when you’re depressed. Sometimes slack is necessary. Besides, you never really know who you will positively influence and how you can change their day. The same for the other way around. These are just things that used to bother me. Not realizing that they didn’t own the company. And even though I still don’t understand all the identity checking when it comes to bill payments because who randomly calls in to pay your bill for you? Hey, I suppose it could happen. Got any kids in college? Ha. I do understand why they should clarify if you need additional assistance on your account. People could assume it’s you and talk about where you live, and your ex or someone could be looking for you. So many reasons to protect you but half the time, they don’t know if you are calling in for a question that has nothing to do with your account. The thing is, I think they have to get the info to get to the questions to help you anyway and its why they ask. Just a thought. At least, it makes me feel better when dealing with so many account questions. The worst is when they want your account number, and I never know it off hand. However, with all of, that said….

Self-care — reaccepting my place. No guilt, no shame,no fear, and no worries. Life is funny like that. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, but you should always learn. I’m a life learner and don’t ever think I will stop doing so. I remember working so hard to see the bigger picture by taking a walk outside and listening to music. It was so difficult to control my emotions, the negative internal self-talk. It’s maybe an eighth of that struggle now, and I pride myself on having the ability to find the beauty in all things, take in my surroundings, be peaceful and quiet, have an open heart and a clear mind. Ahhhhhh….so Zen. But how’d I get here? Soooooo many levels of my own grown and discovery. I’ll be the first to tell you that your growth should never stop. We never stop changing and evolving so why should we stop growing and learning? That’s one of the biggest disservices you can do for yourself, in my opinion. There wasn’t one day I magically changed (although it feels that way now) and some days are quite a challenge (did I even change at all?) because that is what life is. It’s confusing, it’s up and down, with this natural ebb and flow if you allow it. We take for granted the things we should not. We also don’t seem to find the value in self-care, thinking it is a waste of time and effort. Let me tell you, statistically, spending some time on self-care improves your productivity when you return to whatever task you were doing — just a little info there for you.

So, go on and do it. Read a book, take notes, go for a walk, enjoy the weather, grab some coffee, sit and observe others without being on your phone or another tech. Just be. With no music, if you can and tap into turning off the thoughts for the day. With a blank slate and possibly even a smile on your face. I dare you! 15-30 minutes or even an hour. If you take this dare, report back. I’ll be curious to know how it went and how you feel. Until next time my friends, peace, love, and light.

Piper

#insight #Inspiration #lettinggo #selfcare #livinginthepresent #Motivation #perception #serenity #livinginthemoment #whatmattersmost